Dear Terrell Owens,
No one wants you on their team. Owners don’t want you. Coaches don’t want you. And quarterbacks certainly don’t want you.
Do you know how we know this? Not a single NFL coach or scout showed up to your public workout in Southern California yesterday morning. Zero. Zilch. Nada. ESPN showed up, but ESPN will show up for any media circus.
The party is over Terrell. You’re 38. You’re coming off knee surgery. You’ve been a trouble-maker everywhere you’ve played.
You’re a physical specimen but you looked out of shape yesterday. You’re nowhere near football-ready.
Amazingly, one team took pity on you and made you an offer. You could be playing is Chicago next year. The Chicago Rush of the Arena Football League extended you an offer that your agent, Drew Rosenhaus, called “absurd.”
Sad to say Terrell, but that’s the best offer you’re going to get.
Sincerely,
Everyone