Jim Harbaugh and his golden quotes

It’s almost time, Niner Nation!

While FOO’BAAAALLLLLL season officially opens up this Wednesday, I know what you’re all waiting for: Sunday, at precisely 4:25 Pacific Standard Time, when the cameras roll on Lambeau Field and the Green Bay Packers hosting team captains Frank Gore, Patrick Willis, Justin Smith and Alex Smith, and the rest of the San Francisco 49ers clan.

A new season also means regular interviews with our favorite coach, Señor Jim Harbaugh.

UPDATE 12/28/14 Players bid farewell as Harbaugh exits

Besides turning a downtrodden Niners squad into Superbowl contenders in just one season, we all know we love Harbaugh for his ability to churn out memorable one-liners without even trying.

Even during his days as Stanford head coach, Harbaugh knew how to snag a headline, despite not being a fan of the sports press.

Let’s face it: The Jeopardy! category “Quotable Quotes” might as well be dedicated to the 49ers head coach and all his verbal gems.

So in honor of a new season, we’d like to pay tribute to Harbaugh’s ability to turn any hum-drum press conference into sports-news gold. Here are — in no particular order — 15 of the best Jim Harbaugh quotes:

15) On remembering LaMichael James contributed to his final defeat as a college coach (49ers.com):

“I have a memory like an elephant. … I never forget.”

 14) On new receivers vying for a starting job (Santa Rosa Press Democrat):

“It’s going to get real-real, and it’s going to get real-real, real fast for these young guys.”

 13) On acquiring Randy Moss and drafting more wide receivers in the NFL Draft (49ers.com):

“We’re not about fueling the hype.”

12) A couple of weeks later (NBC Bay Area):

“Guilty as charged for fueling the hype. … Well deserved.”

 11) When asked about the ability level of rookie A.J. Jenkins (Santa Rosa Press Democrat):

“I defy anyone to tell me there’s something he lacks.”

10) On quarterback-slash-caddy Alex Smith prepping for the 2012 season (Inside Bay Area):

“It takes about two years in the system to be a real expert at it from the quarterback position, but he’s cut that in half.”

9) On his never-changing wardrobe (SFGate):

“I reduce a lot of drag by not having to choose what your going to wear everyday.”

8) On the altercation with Detroit Lions head coach Jim Schwartz (SFGate):

“I shook his hand too hard. I mean I really went in and it was strong and kind of a slap-grab-handshake. … So, that was on me.”

7) On the weather during the NFC Championship game (Sacramento Bee):

“So I anticipate the we’ll have some precipitation, some weather, and that will be a great thing for us.”

6) After being asked what it was like to play Monday Night Football last season when the lights kept going out (MercuryNews):

“It was dark.”

 5) After being asked a very intricate question about the Niners chances against the Giants in the NFC Championship game (SBNation):

“… What are we talking about?”

 4) On playing catch with Peyton Manning (NFL.com):

“It’s phony, even the perception we were pursuing him. … We were evaluating him.”

 3) On taking vacations (FootballScoop.com):

“I don’t take vacations. I don’t get sick. I don’t observe major holidays. I’m a jack hammer.”

 2) To his team after defeating the Pittsburgh Steelers despite multiple power outages at Candlestick (Youtube.com):

“Honey badger don’t care about no lights!”

 1) On his musical preferences (SBNation):

“If anybody knows how to reach them, I’d like to reunite my all-time favorite band Hootie & The Blowfish to perform at Stanford this fall.”