Calling all Bay Area hockey superstars

Come on, we know you’re out there. You rat around the rinks at Yerba Buena and Oasis. Your favorite NHL team is the Hartford Whalers. You’re living in California for work-school-whatever. But damn, you can play.

You read some story on some website called SFBay that talked about open tryouts for the brand-new San Francisco Bulls hockey team. You started training when you read the story in June. Hard.

By the time the tryouts came around on September 27 and 28 at the Cow Palace, you were on it. You dazzled San Francisco Bulls President and GM Pat “Curdog” Curcio so much that he offered you a spot on the team in time for the franchise’s home preseason debut October 3.

You went on to grind out six seasons in the East Coast Hockey League before retiring on a lucrative Brick Beer endorsement deal in your wife’s hometown of Waterloo, Ontario.

You look fondly upon your time in San Francisco, but especially upon SFBay, who believed in you when nobody else would.

And oh yeah, the whole thing almost never happened, because you nearly missed an important detail buried below some self-indulgent creative writing exercise in that SFBay story.

The tryouts cost $225 per player to participate and include two games, two practices, a jersey and of course socks. Players need to provide their own equipment, including a visor or shield for skaters.

Thankfully, you did end up reading all the way to the bottom of the story, because even you couldn’t miss the link on how to contact the team in order to participate.

You did stop to think for a moment, though: $225 per player? Two days? Jersey and socks included? Is this a genuine opportunity to make a pro team or more of a two-day hockey camp for 50-60 local puckslappers?

Congratulations, kid, you’re not just a great hockey player, you’re also a powerful thinker. Maybe head coach material someday.